perfect conditions for delivery…

tonite we are going to get hammered by 125km winds, rain, hail and who knows what else….so I would like to have my baby please. I am pretty certain that finally giving birth to myffyn will take my mind off the storm and potential for damage to our house. we went for a drive around yesterday to do some errands and there is wide-spread damage to fencing and powerlines…they are predicting that this storm will be worse than the big storm we had back in 2010 which saw some of the worst hail damage ever recorded in western australia yippeee skippeeee can’t wait for this one to hit. when the storm hit two years ago our area had a big umbrella over it and all we got was some light rain, tonight is when we get to experience its wrath so if we could spend the night at hospital that would be best for me.

I had the dream last night that I went into labour and that may account for the fact that rather than my usual 11pm, 1am, 3am and 5am wake up for wee trips I was up every 45 minutes…consequently I am now shattered but have to get ready to pop in to see willy wonka and have him glove up for some more awesome cervix palpation action. I do keep feeling some tightening pains in my uterus – such an awesome word really – and lower abdominal region but everything is so tightly packed in there I probably just need to do a poo – also a fun word. I don’t really have anything to go by for the early signs of labour because everyone is so different – but I am sure that once it gets going I will know. I was looking at some forums online last night to see what the recovery time is like with the different types of cuts they can make for a c section birth – vertical or horizontal – and one woman, bless her, posted “isn’t it called a c section cause they cut in the shape of a c?” nice one.


it tickled me…

today has been a veritable feast of unintentional comedic moments on radio…the morning show regulars on 94.5fm are on a three-week holiday – I hope they went away cause according to the weather channel it’s going to rain for their entire leave period, I don’t really care cause they are not my mates but I do know how unhappy I would be if I was on a three-week holiday and had to put up with this misery inducing climate for the entirety. no wonder so many people migrate from the UK…anyway so this mornings hot topic was the swimmers posting photos of themselves with guns – who cares firstly? – then they were featuring soundbites from eamon sullivan who was calling the aussie swim team officials hypocrites cause they had taken the team to a firing range as a team building exercise during the last olympics prep – that’s not the funny part…one of the last things they played and I havent heard it since was eamon sullivan saying…”shooting is an olympic sport and you don’t see the shooters getting in trouble for posing in their speedos..” well as far as I am concerned they should. the very last thing I ever want to see in the lead up to the olympics is the aussie shooting team in speedos… its bad enough that we have to pick up the paper during triathlon season and see Tony Abbott in his budgie smugglers over morning coffee and toast – and at least Tony is in shape – the shooting team at the olympics on the other hand, not so fit, so while I understand the point lovely eamon – who looks pretty damn good in his dickstickers – was trying to make, 94.5 were playing that at around the same time I was trying to push toast into my face, mmmmm yummy.

the other moment that made me laugh a little was a lady who called in to talk about the loss of power at her house and how they would potentially be without power for up to five days. the radio dude asked her if she was off to work today and absolutely horrified she said “no we’ve got no power, how am I supposed to go to work?” I assumed she must have had an electric car or some other reason that prevented her from heading out the door but no it was just that there was no power so she couldn’t go to work…I would have thought work would be the most logical place to go really – providing they have power of course – staying at home when there is no power is dead boring if you live in the suburbs I would be gagging to go to work. or take the opportunity to pack up the car and go camping for the rest of the week, or just pitch a tent in the back yard and pretend. all good suggestions….but in this case I wanted to call in and suggest she have a wash all be it with cold water if she doesn’t have gas, put on a face and some non ironed clothes and make the most of it. but if she worked for me and called in to say she couldn’t come in because she had no power she would have been met with complete silence while I waited for the rest of the reason…like I have no power and no roof. seriously just having no power is not that bad when work is an alternative option. now if you have no power and have young children at home then you have a challenge and would probably sell your children for the chance to go to work…even if you did look like you slept on your cars back seat last night….