high brow, low brow, no brow….

so what an interesting time I have had this past week. getting the mail has become decidedly unsavoury and a task that I think Mr B Badger.com and I will soon end up competing rock, paper, scissors style to see who makes the unfortunate journey. so knowing that things are just a tad cosy in our budget right now I thought I would save some pennies by waxing my own eyebrows…interesing concept on saving considering that it probably only costs about $15 for me to get them waxed but it would seem my brain is still otherwise engaged and logic is no longer my friend. anyhoo so I decided on the latest from sue ismeil and daughters and purchased the nads wand. now, I have a face that needs eyebrows. short hair with no fringe – or bangs for my american pals – means I really need to have something between my hairline and my eyes. so I get the wand and dial it up, put the “wax” on and then smooth on the strip and then in one quick flick of my de quervains affected wrist I am left with what i can only describe as brow interupted….I have three eyebrows now. two small ones above my left eye and one regular, and out of fear, untouched, one above my right eye. it seems that when i spread the wax I accidentally spread it through the centre of my brow….oops. but I saved $4 in total so job well done.

my conversations this weekend ran the gamut from high brow to low brow – usually it’s the lower end of low brow – anyhoo so we covered off the US Presidential Campaign, boat people, muslim faith, the cost of living, event management in western australia, mirrored sunglasses, MrRoobens poo circles and front wiping versus back wiping. Yep that’s right, the conversation once again went down the toilet – literally. so event management in western australia….head over to the east coast to see how it’s done over there peeps. put it this way they wouldn’t run out of hot food and cold beverages ever let alone at lunch time. and seriously if you are going to charge that much for a can of scotch and dry and a chicken sandwich at least make sure they are available and cold. mirrored sunglasses are my fathers fall back conversation when he has been told to stop talking about people with tattoo’s. I don’t care about tattoo’s and I figure it’s your skin if you want to draw on it then knock yourself out, but I tend to agree with dad when he says that there is a certain sense of frustration when trying to carry out a conversation with a person wearing mirrored sunnies….are they looking at me or are they simply doing the nod and smile while surveying the scenery – they could be asleep under there who knows? MrRooben is incapable of doing his business in one area. most dogs will squat and empty MrWhippy style but not MrRooben. he drops a bit, snaps it off, takes a quarter turn and repeats until he has completed a full circle and what should have been one poo for us to pick up is now four…see what I mean about low brow?? at least he doesn’t have to back up onto a bush like MAC Dog – he’s the psycho kelpie residing with my parentals. and then we get the perils of wiping your bum – do you front wipe or back wipe? this was last nights post dinner conversation and it was a treat. who would have thought you could carry on a discussion about something you should probably never even talk about over the dinner table? what a joy. I get to see my brother very rarely and when we do see each other, once we have caught up on all the usual suspects, we end up talking about wrong stuff – like wiping your arse. one of our past conversations was if you could remember going from no pubes to having pubes…did you get one or two or wake up one morning with a full power muff? who can remember? most people are probably tut tutting right now and using alot of “D” words to describe our behaviour – disgusting, disgraceful, disappointing etc but I reckon after you have popped down from your great height you will think about the pubic hair one…

other topics for the weekend included….is the american green card really green? and the answer is yes and why is the black box coloured orange and the answer is so it is easy to spot amongst the wreckage and the bright orange paint is flame proof. so there you go it’s not all about the toilet sometimes we cover off banal topics that don’t gross people out….

if you happen to see me in the next couple of weeks please try not to focus on my munted eyebrow too much and remember I saved a whole $4 on that job…

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